stripping the myth

Stripping the Myth: Masturbation 

Roll up, roll up, and welcome to our brand-new series ‘Stripping the Myth’! Here, we will be exploring all things sticky and sexy, shunned and shamed, embarking on a journey of discovery through the deconstructing and de-bunking of sex myths.

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A dark-skinned female body is portrayed. Dancing across her hips are white outlines of people. Two of them are standing and one is in a wheelchair

Through the Looking Glass: Violence and the Female Body in Mainstream Pornography

Article by Sophie Somerville, Sex and relationships writer.

In the final throes of my Masters degree in Gender Studies, I have been watching a lot of porn. As an aspiring sex educator with a background in film studies, the research for my thesis has gradually gravitated towards a focus on porn studies. Now, I know what you’re thinking, but alas – hours upon hours of porn consumption has not been the kind of cop-out “research” that it might sound to be.

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Queer safety or queer joy?

This article is based on research conducted in the summer of 2021 as part of my undergraduate Geography dissertation. I would like to thank all those who volunteered their time…

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Dear past me, sex shouldn’t hurt.

What would you tell your younger self about sex if you could? A member of our community opens up about their experience with vaginismus, a pelvic floor condition which makes penetrative sex difficult or impossible. Read more to find out about their experience.

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Dear Past Me

By drawing back this veil of shame we start having these conversations – no two periods are the same, no two menstruators are the same.

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An Investigation into Autism and Sexuality

Dating etiquette is largely unwritten, and for someone with autism, unwritten rules can be confusing and overwhelming… Romantic relationships are hard enough to navigate when one is fluent in the language of love. Imagine how hard they are when one’s not a native speaker.

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Queer Dating Stories

It’s Pride month! In addition to the over-commercialisation of Pride by brands and companies, it’s also a time of reflection for the queer community on our experiences and what being queer means to each of us. 

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What’s the point of sexual fantasies?

For many, their sexual fantasies are a source of shame, a well-kept secret or even a source of anxiety. For others, sexual fantasies are no different from the sex they are already having. The transition from one to another requires much unlearning of sexual norms, personal growth, and open communication with sexual partners. Although challenging, it allows us to expand our understanding of sexual pleasure and explore our sexuality both within and outside of relationships…

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Reclaiming the Dildo

Dildos have a long and controversial history, and have existed for much longer than many of us think. Despite this, they continue to be a taboo topic of conversation. However, dildos can also bring a lot of joy, freedom, and liberation to those who use them. To write this article, I collected responses from a variety of individuals with different gender and sexual identities, and different opinions on dildos. In doing this, I wanted to explore the contested opinions and complex emotions that many have about dildos…

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Dear pre-trauma me, men will harm you more than once…

I can tell you now, even with everything men have put you through, you will still try to see the best in people. Sometimes this will be your downfall. They will gaslight you so much that you will start gaslighting yourself – I wish there was a way to warn you to always trust your intuition. If it feels off, that’s probably because it is…

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Dispelling the myth of the ‘indulgent’ orgasm

Despite the leaps made in popular representations of the female orgasm, the orgasm gap is very much still present for many straight women. Why is it that the myth of female sexuality as deviant, excessive, and indulgent still impacts our sexual experiences?

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Biphobia and Me

Like so many things in life, my sexuality makes so much more sense in retrospect than it did when I was in the stages of “figuring it out”. I now know I have been bisexual all my life. I either just didn’t know it earlier on, or didn’t know what it entailed.

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Not Sure I was ‘Born This Way’

I want to talk about something that’s been on my mind for a while now. For many years now, it has been a staple rhetoric of the queer liberation that nobody ‘chooses’ to be gay: a backlash against those who call it a ‘lifestyle’, who try to push conversion therapy and deviant labels on us.

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My Crush, the Far right Troll

As my time at university comes to an end, I look back at moments that changed my education. From relative deprivation to conflict theory to homegrown vs lone wolf terrorism, the first year of university would hold lessons I’ll carry with me all my life as a politics enthusiast. But nothing could prepare me for the lessons of the summer of Roman*. This was my first brush with heartbreak and politics of the real world.

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The Pleasure Gap

A couple of months ago I was scrolling through Instagram when I saw the same post come up again and again on people’s stories. Repeated posts are not unusual, but there was something about this one that deeply chimed with me.

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The Spectacle of Violence

I recently read that tourists in the US can take ‘sex trafficking bus tours’ to ‘shudder over locations where they’re told sexual violence has recently occurred’ (1). Learning this was not something I was able to take lightly. I carried the words around with me for days, alongside the absolute bafflement they gave rise to. 

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You May Be Okay, but It’s Not Okay

Without thinking, I turned from the main, busy street into a side alley. I was running late to see a friend, and Google Maps showed this route through dark, pot-holed Athens back streets to be the fastest way to get to my destination. I hurried along, frowning down at the map on my phone screen whilst music blared through my headphones. I don’t know when I became aware of his presence. But I remember feeling my stomach drop. You are not safe said my body to my mind.

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