illness and beauty

Illness and beauty

to appreciate our beauty 
is to appreciate what goes on behind it
the very production
the machinery 
that ticks us on
that is the true beauty
that all our bodies work 
keep us all alive
but like with all hard work 
sometimes it struggles
sometimes it fails
seeing beauty in ourselves is hard
to find beauty in ourselves when it feels
the very production
the machinery
that ticks us on
doesn’t work
can feel harder
our bodies feel like weights
that drag
the invisibility of our suffering 
a struggle in itself
whilst putting on a brave face
and hiding the pain
with envy
of the beauty of normal 
of a working body

our beauty 
is in our armour 
our ability 
to keep moving
to care for ourselves 
to both accept and deny
our beauty 
is worn everyday 
whether it’s in our tears 
or in our smiles

Nancy Loud

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