I have two mothers

I have two mothers

I have two mothers
One who bore me, raised me  
And the step mother who’s lap I fell into 
One nourished my soul
The other taught me how to be whole
One’s love kept me furled 
The other showed me the gigantic world 
A step-mother? I say, surprisingly  
Yes, I never wanted you here
You simply were never part of the plan
How did mum allow this?
How did she accepted help from another woman
to raise her child?
She says a twinge of jealousy shot through her body
When I said I was happy here
But today I sit here thinking 
How do I solely become one’s!
I belong to both equally 
I hold myself responsible for them both
Mrs.Back-home and Mrs.Home 
Stepmom taught me all the clever tricks 
Which I then used to improvise mum’s wholesome ways 
I never wanted mum to feel she’s lesser in anyway 
I wanted her to walk the modern way 
For if one day, stepmom abandons me
Back home is ready to embrace this evolved self
For if one day, when stepmom taunts me on my past
I can prove her wrong.
You see, I don’t know anymore 
Who do I belong to more 
The heart is divided, maybe that is the reason it is not at peace
I carry the fear of being unfair 
Today I live in a limbo 
Torn and empty 
Tired of proving my love for both 
Today, I long for both 
Neither I hear mum’s cries 
Nor I see stepmom’s glorious skies
I ask, were my plans foiled?
Even though our situation is peaceful 
I pray that one is never in it
but if they ever find themselves here 
I promise to set an example for them of 
Coexisting in two distant worlds

Yours truly,
Miss.Immigrant 

Fatema Kiani
Instagram: @fatemabayan

 

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